The furore the ‘despicable’ Foreign Office memo about the Pope‘s upcoming trip to the UK has sparked in the papers this weekend teaches us three things: -
1. ‘Disgusted, Tunbridge Wells‘ journalism is alive and well. Reading most of the coverage you can practically hear the jowls of middle England wobbling in indignation over their toast and marmlade
2. That Catholic spokespeople do have a sense of humour. (And let’s face it, they probably appreciate all the light relief they can get at the moment)
3. If you do anything remotely creative for a living you should never, EVER show your rough working to anyone who’ll take it at face value
There’s a good reason why the creative process is shrouded in mystery. And it’s not because the process of creating ideas is so magical that we need to keep it secret. It’s because that it often involves throwing around ideas that, at first glance, are stupid, nonsensical and even deeply offensive.
Clients like to work with agencies who offer fresh and surprising ideas. And the challenge of maintaining a high quality of ideas, even when you’ve worked with a client for many years, is a constant struggle. Not least because the human brain is a contrary and negative thing. We all know that it’s easier (and more fun) to knock something down than it is to build it.
This is why, as Speed’s creative director, I often start brainstorms with an exercise called ‘Battleships’, in which we list out all the ways in which we think a product, service or client could sink without trace. It’s a way of harnessing the power of negative thinking – to positive ends. Not only does it release people’s negative attitudes, but it can also be a source of rather brilliant ideas. Often all a ‘bad’ idea needs is a slight change in emphasis and it turns into the campaign slogan or initiative that wins you a big pitch. Moreover, the more limits you put on people’s thinking in terms of what’s appropriate, the more boring and obvious their ideas become.
Hence why I found the news that the raw and unpolished results of a Foreign Office brainstorm had found its way to the papers so thoroughly depressing. No one in their right mind really expects the Pope to endorse condoms, but it’s a pretty safe bet that he’ll be picketed by the safer sex lobby all through his visit to the UK. So how are the Foreign Office mandarins going to work around it?
The Foreign Office was right to spend time thinking about what failure and disaster looks like. Because without understanding that, it will never plan a successful visit for the Pope. Its only mistake was sharing its insight with people who don’t understand that before you can, in the words of Bing Crosby, “accentuate the positive”, you have to “eliminate the negative”.

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